the “ribbit” theory
Hey Sistahs.. I am JUICED to write today. It has absolutely nothing to do with cardmaking so if ya feel like reading about a card.. or a technique, I recommend you go to all of my talented Sistahs’ site.. you know the ones who are SO talented.. so resourceful, so AMAZING? Ya.. if that’s what you want today, I recommend you visit them PRONTO (look at my favorite blogs I read)… Ok, so this is the scoop. I am hoping that everyone who reads my blog (all 8 of you) will remember a few posts ago where I spoke about the frog and how he “ribbits”. I have decided to call this the “ribbit theory” as it applies to MANY situations.. not just a cardmaker’s lack of muse.
Several situations here… had a long convo with my friend Natanya.. she went clothes shopping today. It is beautiful out today and EVERYONE would probably be thrilled, right? Wrong! This nice weather means that I have to put away my SNOW SUIT and bring out the SHORT SLEEVES!!! OH MY. This is the time where I think.. why didn’t I start Weight Watchers 9 months ago???? So Natanya was so excited to go clothes shopping.. she had tons of money to spend for a summer wardrobe! So she goes into this store which is meant for the MINIS of this world (really Minis.. like mini in the sense that 95% of the population don’t fit in their clothes).. brings a WHOLE bunch of clothes into the dressing room (this is the figurative part where the frog is SINGING “hello my lady, hello my darling… ) , starts trying on the goodies with her body reflected in a 4 way mirror and….. RIBBBBBBBBIIIIIITTTTTTTT… nothing fits the way she wanted and things she never noticed before were noticed… WHAT’S up wit DAT? Why do stores INSIST that you must see yourself at every angle? I dont care WHAT size you are.. everyone has a little sum’n sum’n (pronounced like ‘somethin somethin’) that they don’t want peeking right back at them.. You know what I am sayin, sistahs? I will never forget, I was telling Natanya this today that I once went to a warehouse sale and wanted to try something on… I went to this COMMUNAL changing room where a million boobs and tushes were staring at me… I was MORTIFIED.. the fact that I HAD TO UNDRESS in front of all these people? I did do it.. that tells me I musta been a little slimmer.. but I will never forget this experience…
Here’s yet another question.. why is it that you can put on a full face of makeup, go to the hairdresser and when your hair is wet, you look in their sparkling mirror in front of you and you look like a wet drowned rat who is as white as casper the friendly ghost? Actually at that point I am more like Casper the PISSED OFF white ghost! Do they do something to the mirrors? DO they want you to feel like that? LIke the dressing room mirrors.. do they NOT want you to buy the clothes? I recommend they remove ALL mirrors. That will ensure increased sales.. me thinks… no?
Ok, last.. what about those videocameras.. they should be banned for ALL PURPOSES aside from our children.. My DH decided to candidly videotape me in the kitchen with a mouth full of food no less… shall I say more? I am going into hiding in my SNOWSUIT.. pronto. This is why, sistahs, the holy one invented ACCESSORIES. First of all, they ALWAYS FIT and second of all, if a pair of shoes don’t fit, we DON”T CARE that we need a bigger size… LOL! GOTTA LOVE SHOES AND PURSES.
Another little fun anecdote.. I LOVED THIS.. I called one of my suppliers in the U.S. tracing a shipment… The lady in customer care asked for my company name.. I told her “stamping bella”… she says to me ” I LOVE YOUR STAMPS”.. I say to her… Ummm how do you know about my stamps????? She says to me, I am a ‘sistah’ you know… OMG I freaked out!! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED!!!! I want to be connected to people all over the world!! I was SOOOOO happy! That should be our code word… “sistah”.. LOL . Is that the cutest thing you ever heard?
OK, I need to go out and buy the SMALLEST purse ever made… cuz I KNOW it’ll fit.